Breaking Broken News

First we had “keep f*$%ing that chicken” and now we have this. I now fear morning television and the grocery store at the same time.

This is why Croatia will never beat us in basketball. With .6 seconds left in the game Croatia scores a 3-pointer to win the game and started celebrating the win. But then with .5 seconds left Serbia puts up a miracle half court shot to win the game. Better luck and a little less celebration next time, Croatia.

I have a feeling there won’t be a big fine against C-SPAN for airing Senator Carl Levin constantly saying “shitty deal”. It’s not as flashy as Janet Jackson’s boob at the Super Bowl, but for C-SPAN, this is about as good as it’s going to get.

Just go to Arizona and put this on your car and get an all-expenses paid trip to Mexico! Good luck!

Cable news loves nothing more than some crazy ass metaphors.

Looks like you need to practice that ollie a little harder there Cheryl.

We haven’t posted anything for a few days. We’ve been trying to figure out how to pronounce that Icelandic volcano’s name and these reporters and anchors aren’t helping the matter.

Well, after this, I’m not really sure who is less serious. In the words of John McEnroe, “You can not be serious!”

You can go ahead and skip to 2:25 and get ready to see the incredible Brown Haired Guy Who’s Not Steve Doocey wrestle UFC fighter B.J. Penn. We should just shut this site down right now, because I don’t think it can get any better than this.

Well, that’s one way to answer the critics.